Mary Dexter, again and again: Four Dexters of the same name have lived at 60 Elm St.
Mary Louise Dexter says she cannot pinpoint a favorite Mary Dexter story.
"It's different every day," she said. "Something comes up. I touch something or move something, or someone comes in and is interested in the house. It depends on that day."
The Cortland woman lives in a house at 60 Elm St., owned by three other Mary Dexters. She is the fourth Mary Dexter to own the building, built 150 years ago. Only a Mary Dexter has been listed on the deed.
May Louise, 82, an author, researcher of gravestones and volunteer at the Cortland County Historical Society, lives there with her cousin, Bob, a retired JM Murray employee.
"I am proud to be able to live here and keep it up, in the memory of the three Mary Dexters that preceded me," she said Jan. 17. "It is all really an accident of history. I am sure there are some homes that are lived in by four, five, six generations. But it just happens that four Mary Dexters have owned and lived in this house."
"I think it's great that they appreciate the property that much, that they kept it in the family," said Betsy Larkin, Cortland County clerk, who verified that four Marys were listed on the deed. "You don't see that anymore."
It's more common in rural families, she said.
"People were a lot tougher back then, " Larkin said of the Civil War vets coming home with injuries, some dying from them. "And the women carried on. There wasn't any welfare, Department of Social Services or food stamps. They had to survive."
"I think it's pretty unusual," said Tabitha Scoville, director of the Cortland County Historical Society. "The circumstances that led to the first Mary having a house were unusual...Women didn't own a lot of property."
The first Mary and her house
Mary Ann (Delaney) Dexter, Mary Louise Dexter's great-grandmother, bought the lot in 1872. The house was built in 1873.
"It's a very narrow lot. It's only 48 feet wide," Mary Louise Dexter said.
The two-story house is considered a "poor man's Victorian, having porches with little rick rack," she said "There is an attic. There are three bedrooms on the second floor. When it was originally built, there was a bedroom over here," she said, on the first floor," and a small bedroom behind us."
The basement has a coal bin and a water cistern.
"The rain off the roof filled the cistern," Mary Louise said. A vent in the middle of the first floor brought up heat from the basement furnace. Mary Louise added a modern furnace, and two more vents, but the second floor is still cool.
"It's chilly," she said. "But for 150 years, no one has complained."
The Dexter house is where the Dexter family reunion takes place every five years.
Mary Ann (Delaney) Dexter was an Irish domestic whose husband, Ira Edward Dexter, was a Civil War veteran. The couple had one child and Mary Ann was pregnant with her second when her husband died at 35 of a Civil War injury. She tried for years to get a pension from the government through her husband. She finally got a retroactive payment for more than $700.
"It was like winning the lottery," Mary Louise said.
Mary Ann Delaney Dexter promptly bought the narrow lot at 60 Elm St. and the house was built. The tax levy for the lot as 66 cents. This escalated to $1.73 when the structure was completed. Mary Ann Dexter died at her home of anemia in 1895, according to a piece written by Mike Dexter, brother of Mary Louise and a retired Cortland Water Board meter reader.
Mary no.2 has illustrious husband
Mary Ellen (Farrell) Dexter, Mary No.2, married Ira Austin Dexter in 1896. Ira, son of the first Mary, worked at Wickwire Brothers wire mill for 66 cents a day. He was employed there from 1884 to 1904.
In 1904, the couple had five children. Ira asked his boss for a raise. The boss said, no. Ira quit and bought a cigar store, named Dexter Cigar store at
95 Main St. He ran it for 42 years. And the couple would eventually have eight children, all living at 60 Elm St., Mike Dexter said.
Ira played and coached baseball and his five sons excelled in basketball. Ira Dexter died in 1941 at 73. Later, Cortland would name the park at the end of Elm Street after him, Mike Dexter said. Mary Ellen outlived her husband by 15 years, all the while living in the house.
Mary Louise remembers her grandmother being disabled.
"After her eight children were born, she developed some sort of illness," Mary Louise Dexter said. It was a 40-year ailment that saw her using a cane, a walker and eventually she'd need a lift for movement. "But two of her daughters lived in her house and took care of her...She lived to 86," said Mary Louise. She died in the home.
Mary No.3
The house was left to Mary Helen Dexter, the oldest child of Mary Ellen and Ira Austin Dexter.
Mary No.3 was a member of the first physical education graduating class of the
Cortland Normal School in 1917, Mike Dexter said. She was a traveling physical education teacher in Cortland County.
"She visited one-room schools in a horse and buggy. She was afraid of horses," Mary Louise said.
It was her practice to rent a horse and buggy from the livery stable in town to get to her job. They didn't have a car. "That's what you did," Mary Louise said. She noted the houses with barns in the Cortland area. The barn was for the horse and buggy.
"On one occasion, (Mary Helen Dexter) was headed to Homer (via horse). She got to Homer Avenue viaduct where a train was coming. The train scared the horse. It turned around and went full bore down Homer Avenue to the livery. That was it for her," Mary Louise said.
The third Mary became a secretary at Brewer-Titchener Corp. for more than 40 years.
"I am the first person in this house to own a car," Mary Louise Dexter said. "I had to put in the driveway slip out here to have a place to park it."
Mary Helen Dexter lived to be 87.
"I think of her has a progressive woman. I lived with her in the house for 10 years. I got to know her. She saw electricity. She saw indoor plumbing. She saw airplanes. She saw TV. I think of all the things that happened in her lifetime. That made her special," said Mary Louise.
The first two Marys died in the house. But Mary No.3?
"Mary Helen was different," said Mary Louise.
"My mother and brother Mike picked up Mary Helen and went to church on Thanksgiving Day," she said. "She walked into church, sat down, opened her purse to take out the envelope to put it in the basket, put down her head and died. In
St. Mary's Church!"
Back to the house and Mary No.4
The house has narrow stairs, with 16 steps to the second floor, instead of the usual 13 or 14, said Mary Louise Dexter. She installed extra railings. "In 150 years, no one has fallen down these steps," she told a guest. "Don't be the first."
Mary Louise is working on the family genealogy and after COVID-19, the Dexters want to get back to their reunion schedule, which was interrupted because of the pandemic.
She is grateful for her health, her Irish genes, her family and the house.
And the Dexter story- that goes in a wavy line, back and forth, she said. "It doesn't go in a straight line."